Run for you life! Twentay's Great Escape!
by LovingTheOgre
Summary: After Twentay's fic ends Anko is on his tail and while running he lands in Sound. Now lost in a world of cross dressing Uchiha's and pervy snakes and rapists...will he survive with his sanity and virtue intact? Hope you like it Twentay! Review and I go on
1. Running for my Virtue!

Run for you life! Twentay's Great Escape!

Disclaimer I donit own the characters from Naruto nor do I own Twentay, he belongs to himself and if he isn't careful, the heroine(?)villian of the story.

I hope ya like it Twentay!

Running.

That's all I seem to do nowadays, since Shino was let loose from HER. Crap I almost fell off the branch!

**Crack!**

Crud I'm falling!

I land on my feet and roll on the soft grass and into a grove where I am safely hidden in the underbrush of prikly bushes. Great, now I've got crap in my hair...it'll take forever to get it all out...oh! I should introduce myself huh? I'm a young male that likes writing and am at the moment running for my life. I like long walks on the beach and love playing the trombone. I am also a lover of music and am a generally patient and nice guy but have a hidden temper. I'm a little over 6" with long-ish soft brown hair-proceeds to hair flip- a slim Sasuke build with a bit more muscles and hazel eyes. -blinks to show off eye shiney-ness-

**Shhft!**

I hear feet softly land on the grass near my hiding spot and suddenly I feel like I'm Shuya Nanahara from Battle Royal (look it up) hiding from one of my psychotic classmates holding a beretta...well, I guess the fact that the woman chasing me is the most gorgeous creature I've ever seen. Purple wild hair, wide brown eyes, a very reveling net shirt-she wears a jacket but still-and a helluva body...why am I running again?

**Click CLICK!**

Oh yeah...the tranquilizer gun that the holding and the potato bag of restraints slung on her back.

Did I mention that Anko Miturashi is insane?

I didn't? Oh well, she is.

Anyway, that click sound? It was the gun that she is planning to get me with. I keep imagining that needle, on the tranq, must be big and pointy...the pain that one would come across with that planted on their rears...and man, my rear is too beautiful to be shot with a tranq and...I digress...

"C'mon out cutey...if you're nice and obediant it'll be nice for ya I swear!"

What's with the accent?

She walks closer to my hiding place and I'm sure she spotted me already...it's like she's Elmer Fudd and I'm Bugs Bunny only without all the humorous gags...is she sniffing the air?

Suddenly she staring towards the grove, at the bushes I'm hiding in! I realize I don't have a weapon except my trusted keyboard in which I wrote my previous story on...HEY! I'll just use it and beam my way out of here! I began to quickly, and quietly type on the keyboard until it dims...aw man...it ran out of batteries!

I look up at Anko from my hiding spot and see her innocently looking at the bushes...she so beautiful and hey, why is she suddenly leering and licking her lips?

Did she just take a smoke gas outta her potato bag of doom? Whys she putting it on and is that...oh GOD not the tear gas!

As soon as the tear gas begins to envelop my general area, IE the grove, I run out like a bat outta hell with Anko right on my tail. I don't dare look back since I can only imagine an evil demon with drooling fang filled mouth on my tail...she growling.

"P-please for the love of GOD I'm just a child!" I shout in hopes that she'll reconsider-futile I know-

"RAWR!"

"OH GOD!" I will my way to run faster, my legs are burning, my lungs feel dried up and I could have sworn that I just passed Orochimaru and Kabuto playing dressup...weren't they in Sound?

I look back and notice that Anko is no longer on my tail-although I know she still pursues- and look up at the building in front of me...my eyes widen and I anime cry.

"OH GOD WHY? WHY ME? I SWEAR IF IT'S NOT ONE THING IT'S ANOTHER!"

I had run all the way to Sound, into the village where I had stopped in front of a club...a host club. Now how is this a bad thing? Well, let me just elaborate.

It's name was Orochi's Super Special Awesome Host Club!

What's worse?

"NUUU!" I ran inside as Anko passed by looking for me and ran smack dab into the truest form of evil...

"Hn."

Sasuke Uchiha in an Alice in Wonderland frilly dress and bonnet...

"Oh no...dear Lord say it isn't so..."

"Welcome to the club..."

With Anko just outside sniffing the ground like a demented hound dog and Sasuke in frilly drag in front of me I had little choice in what to do...I couldn't go outside I know I couldn't out run Anko, but I couldn't stand to stare at Sasuke either...what to do?

Sasuke just stared at me and smirked.

"So you're the new house boy huh?"

Say what?

"Huh?"

"C'mon I'll show you to the dressing room...you need a waiter costume."

Oh I had just sunken into hell now , I realized as Sasuke grabbed my wrist and dragged me to the back room...I hope that I make it out of this hell unscathed.

**OUTSIDE: **

Anko rubs her hands together and smiled evilly making a baby nearby cry and Orochimaru shiver with terror.

"Soon my precious soon...kukukukukukukukuku!"

Sera: So uh...there it is...it aint done but I hope you like it Twentay! Don't worry you wont be in drag and Sasuke fans...dont kill me please!

Review for myself and Twentay please!!!!! Save the wayward monkey's with your generous reviews!

Twentay:...Um...money's?

Sera: Save the whales!

Twentay:...


	2. I'm a BOY!

Run for you life! Twentay's Great Escape!

Disclaimer I dont own the characters from Naruto nor do I own Twentay, he belongs to himself and if he isn't careful, the Madam(?) of the story.

I hope ya like it Twentay and sorry for leaving you in such a bad place in the previous chapter!

-

This has got to be some nightmare...I hope that I am at lest dreaming because I sure as hell can't be awake right now, I mean...

I'm in a maid uniform-I am wearing Lolita type clothing with itchy frills and a bonnet!

Stupid bonnet!

I look into the bright pink rimmed mirror of the back room of Orochi's Super Special Awesome Host Club and I swear that Sasuke, whom has just changed into Sailor Moon, is laughing at me.

ME!

I cough into my gloved hand and stare at the apparently seasoned drag queen and glare.

"Hn." he says and gropes my chest.

Now...for those of you who would like to know how a heart attack feels like, I'll tell you...your heart feels like it's going to do a marathon in your chest and your hand begins to ache.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YA DOIN' YA FILTHY ANIMAL!?!"

SMACK!

Ok...so maybe my hand ached because I slapped him.

"what? I was checking if you were really a guy or not!"

Kick!

"I am a guy you FREAK! What made you think otherwise?"

"...the dress."

Swak!

"You're a freakin' SAILOR SCOUT and were previously ALICE in WONDERLAND and you are questioning my MANHOOD?"

"Stop thowing stuff!"

"Never!"

-From outside the dressing room-

Bang!

Crack!

Crash!

"Stop!"

BOOM!

Orochimaru stared at the dressing room with mild amusement on his face. He straightened his nurses outfit at the skirt and smiled at Kabuto.

"It seems that Sasuke is enjoying himself."

"You mean with the brown eyed beauty he went into the back room with? I'm a bit jealous." Kabuto said fixing the tie on his red hood and shifted through his picnic basket. "No girls every designate me."

"That wasn't a girl, that was the new waiter for the club."

"Ah."

SMACK!

"AIIEEE!!!!"

"See I told you to stop that! Now you hurt yourself!"

"DIE!"

Orochimaru lifted his glass and took a drink while Kabuto's face turned beat red.

"well I suggest that we open up a bit later to let the boy recuperate."

"Well said Lord Madam."

-Somewhere around the village-

Anko surveyed her area once again before deciding to camp out in an inn across from the Host Club. She sighed deeply as she polished her weapons, reloaded her tranq gun and check her chains and ropes. One could never be to careful, your prey might get away without giving your equipment a routinely check.

Not that anyone had gotten away from her, no sir, this boy had been the first and although it was fun in the beginning she was beginning to get angry.

And that was never a good thing.

"Hm..." She said picking up a mangled keyboard. She lifted it to her face and took a long sniff, she'd find his scent easier with something that belonged to him. "Apparently he's an author of Fanfiction...and this must be a way to get to his world."

wait, his world?

She smiled deviously.

If she had the keyboard of an Author that meant that she could bend her world like they did...that meant she could have anyone and make anyone do anything.

"Finally I get my chance at revenge! After I thoroughly molest that boy into oblivion I'll make ever girl fandom come true and while I film it I shall reap the rewards! I'll sell it to the YAOI Association and with all that oney rule the world! And no man will be able to run from me again! KUKUKUKUKUKUKUKUKUKUKU!!!!!"

-The Club-

"Lord Madam?"

Orochimaru shivered again.

"I swear that Anko is close by...but that's crazy! If she were here there would be a riot in the streets...men would disapear from their beds and the cries of the innocents would fill our ears..."

Kabuto gulped.

"Really sir?"

"Not only that but she'd rape and steal my clients! I can't have that!"

"um...no that would be a disaster?"

As Orochimaru-I mean-Lord Madam continued to whine a very bruised Uchiha and a very angry Twentay walked out the back room. Kabuto smiled warmly their way and Orochimaru stopped his rant.

"Nice to see you Sasuke and you are?"

"Twentay."

Kabuto bowed.

"Nice to meet you Twentay...and my, I am so very surprised."

Twentay sweat dropped. He didn't like this guy, he didn't like this place. Once he was sure that Anko was gone and once he was able to find his trusty keyboard and get home he vowed to burn the place down...and kill Sasuke...maybe not even in that order.

"Suprised about what Kabuto?" Sasuke asked annoyed and a bit dishevled. He'd had to change outfits so now he was wearing Kagome's(from Inuyasha) school uniform.

Orochimaru smirked in his snakey way.

"well we heard thispoor boy scream..." He turned to Twentay. "we assume that Sasuke's manhood was too much for you wen he tried to give it to you."

Blood drained from Twentay's face and Sasuke startled to shae with mirth.

OH HeLL NO!

NO NO NO NO!

"WHAT? THAT IS NOT WHAT HAPPENED YOU MICHAEL JACKSON IMPERSONATOR! I WAS BEATIN' THE CRAP OUTTA HIM AND THE MIRROR FELL ON ME THAT'S IT!"

"Sure it was." Kabuto said still smiling.

Twentay threw a table at them and stalked off to the back.

"Freaking perverts." He said disapearing behind the back door.

Suddenly the front door was kicked in and Anko held her gn up high.

"Have any of you ladies seen this boy?" She held up a badly drawn picture of Twentay done in crayon.

"No."

"Uh sorry."

"Hn."

Anko frowned then skiffed the keyboard for his scent.

"well that's odd his scent if here...aw well...sorry to bother you working women. Bye!"

After she left Orochimaru sighed.

"And she wonders why I abandoned her..."

Sasuke shrugged.

"Give men some women's clothing and they are unrecognizable...I wonder if Naruto would be the same?"

"who knows..."

-

Front Ichiraku's Ramen Naruto sneezed.

-

Sera: So here was chapter two. Tanks for reviewing!

Twentay: I'm scared for life...I saw Orochimaru in drag...was flirted with by Kabuto...I'm sure that was flirting and Sasuke touched me...-shivers- that was ewww...

Sera: Really now? I thought it was hilarious.

Twentay: Really? You would.

Sera: Anyway, next time if there is one...Twentay is designated by Anko who doesn't know it him and Naruto and the gang show up...

Twentay: Oh joy...

Sera: Hope to see ya soon!


	3. Clow Captures a mystic adventure!

Run for you life! Twentay's Great Escape!

Disclaimer I don't own the characters from Naruto nor do I own Twentay, he belongs to himself and if he isn't careful, the Kyubi(?) of the story.

I hope ya like it Twentay and I really got to stop leaving you in such bad places in the story, ne?

-

It's about eleven o clock and I'm being ushered into what will be my room for the little amount of time that I will be staying here.

It's a tiny room with bunk beds a vanity right beside the window on the far right and a hope chest that had a sticker that says 'Sound Pride' on it in glitter.

I am not impressed.

I stalk towards the bunk bed and sit myself on the bottom; Sasuke's snoring on the top bunk which he had stated was his before leaping up there and falling asleep.

Oh yeah, did I mention that I am sharing a room with his royal princess pain in the ass? I didn't? Oh, well yeah he's my roommate-oh crud I threw up in my mouth just a little bit.

I take my small bag, I'd had to sneak out of the bar to buy some clothes and other things-and placed them in the empty hope chest. After talking to Orochimaru, which I wont wish on even the biggest jerk-I learned that my pay wouldn't be horrible and that I would be given protection.

Protection? Ha! Give me a break!

If I come to see Anko coming my way I'm throwing him and little princess Sasuke and hauling ass. That's my battle plan.

And what's plan B you ask?

I have no clue…I was hoping that the whole Orochimaru and Sasuke tossing would be enough.

Stop rolling your eyes it's a great plan.

-coughs into hand- Anyway as I was saying…oh yes I-

_"kukukukukukuku!"_

I keep hearing that laugh I swear it's coming from the inn across the street.

I wonder what kinda nut is making that noise?

**-view pans to Anko-**

"Kukukukukukukukuku!!!!!!!!!"

**-Back on Twentay-**

Argh whatever I'm going to bed, I'll continue narration in the morning.

**-Next morning in Konoha-**

Naruto sat up in bed, stretching his limbs and smiling dumbly at…nothing. He tosses his sleeping cap off and meanders to the bathroom to do bathroom-like things…I am not describing it so we'll just wait till he's done.

…

What? Don't look at me like that! I can't make him go any faster!

…

…

After five minutes Naruto walked out the bathroom wearing his normal outfit, singing.

"I want ramen! I want ramen! Gonna get Ramen today hey hey!" Suddenly he stops and stares out the window…has he found the camera crew?

"My Sasuke senses are tingling!"

Phew! He didn't find us…

"Must locate emo!"

And whoosh! Off he goes, out that door on his way to try an retrieve Sasuke…again.

**-Orochi's Super Special Awesome Host Club-**

"No."

"It doesn't look that bad Twentay."

"Hell no."

Staring into the mirror in the dressing room a not so morning person, me, stared into image reflected into the mirror.

It just wasn't me. I'm Twentay, a guy. Sure I might not be the bulkiest and manly man…I'm not the freakin' Brawny man but this…this!?!

This is ridiculous!

I'm wearing a freaking Card Capture Sakura outfit!

The pink frilly one with the pink bonnet!

"You look…cute."

I look at Sasuke with literal fire in my eyes.

"Go to hell."

"All ready there young Clow master."

He's dressed as that Shuichi guy from Gravitation…He's got the black little short jumpsuit thing and the short sleeved yellow trench with black gloves-I find the pink wig he has to wear hilarious!

But that's besides the point…he insulted me…I must throw something.

**SMACK!**

The coffee table did the trick apparently. He lands on the floor face first with a **whumping** sound. Did I hear a crack? Did I break his brain?

Before he wakes up Kabuto-wearing a cat outfit- bombards me with giggles and a smile. He grabs my arm, and Sasuke's foot, and drags out of the back. This is a long nightmare that just needs to end.

I'd rather be stuck in a room with IT then these losers.

Opening time is soon you two! Get yourselves ready! Tee Hee!"

Did he just? Oh God get me outta here!

As I was about to make my way out of the club, using my clow wand stick thing as a weapon, the door burst open and I came face to face with Naruto.

Blink.

"Uh…hello."

He's just staring at me…why is he staring at me?

"Wow! You're the prettiest girl I've ever seen!"

"WHAT?"

The little idiot takes my hand and goofily smiles and I swear I am close to killing him until Orochimaru-dressed as a bride-comes up behind up and places his slimy snake hands on my shoulder.

"Why hello young sir, I am the Madam. Do you designate this 'girl' for the day?"

My eye is twitching.

"Uh well I was looking for someone…I thought he might be here…but um. Sure why not!"

Twitch.

Growl.

Knuckles cracking.

I'll kill this kid!

And I was about to until things got a whole lot worse.

How did that happen, you ask?

Well, Anko just walked through the front door.

-

Sera: There! Long winded but I had no idea for this chapter and I know it's not very good so bear with me please. This chapter is here to merely send everything into motion. And yes, Naruto shows how idiotic he could be.

Twentay: Sasuke called me cute…-shudders-

Sera: Sorry just needed some humor and I wanted everyone to question Sasuke's sexuality.

Twentay: More so then they already do?

Sera: Yup.

Twentay: I feel so dirty!

Sera: Then take a bath! Anyway, review and I will continue with it! No flames please! For those Fan girls out there if you review I'll give you a shirtless Gaara and Neji!

Twentay: o.O'

Sera: REVIEW!


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